Procrastination, man. It’s not one of the majors in the “deadly sin” firmament, but it should be. Because it’s killing your dreams. And mine.

A little dramatic, you think? No. Not really.

Dreams come in a couple of categories:

1. Big, “Bucket List” dreams:  Before you die, you desperately want to bike from Vancouver to Newfoundland, learn to speak Japanese, write a screenplay, record your music, get published, fall in mad love and get married… like that.
2. Mid-sized, sand-pail dreams: Things you feel would make your life better, and while disappointing, wouldn’t make you feel like you necessarily failed at life if you didn’t achieve them: bake bread from scratch, rebuild a classic car, go camping in YoHo, run a race, own a motorbike…
3. Every day, dog-bowl-sized dreams: Deliver the paper/project by Friday, clean out your closet, spend more time with your kids, mow the grass, weed the garden, file for divorce, get in shape…

The big and mid-sized dreams form the hoped-for trajectory of your life. To procrastinate making these dreams come true is to rob yourself of a life of you are in crazy, juicy love with.  In the end, if not attaining them looks like a broad sweep of joy off the table of your life, I would argue that a failure to manage the every-day, small goals is like ten-thousand paper cuts draining your happiness until then instead. Procrastination is where all dreams, big and small, go to die.

Procrastination is the seed of self-destruction - Matthew Burton

How can we overcome procrastination? How can we stop sabotaging our stupid selves and live our best, least-regret-filled lives? Because regardless of how organized or disciplined a person is, as TED Talker Tim Urban of Wait But Why observes everyone is procrastinating about something.

There are two general scenarios in which we procrastinate: (1) Situations with hard deadlines (and therefore hard and often immediate consequences) and (2) those without.  Deliverable items for work or school, for instance vs. cleaning your bathroom, losing 20 lbs or finally painting your deck.

In managing procrastination in the first scenario, Pomodoro’s are King. I’ve written about them before and they are a practical, easy way to manage your monkey mind, get out of your own way and do the thing you need to do.  Pomodoros still allow you to indulge your inner monkey but in a controlled way. When we consider research from Ipsos Open Thinking Exchange that the average person wastes more than three and a half hours a day on social media, it's clear procrastination is the scourge of productivity and anything that helps provide boundaries and train discipline is good.

Then again, Pomodoro's are imperfect too because they depend on you to actually DO THEM. Like, not putting off trying the system, say. And even then, you need to continue to use it to make it work for you. Off the wagon - then on again.

As a lifelong procrastinator-come-last-minute-panicked-doer I’m deeply, profoundly, intimately sympathetic to the struggle. Still. Endlessly. The irony of me finishing this post the morning I am to post it isn't lost on me... Writer, Heal Thyself! 

That said, the "deadline" scenario of procrastination is comparatively easy to sort out. Not easy-easy. Just compared to the no-deadline scenario, easy, because this is the real dream-building – and crushing – realm of our lives; it’s the one without immediate and painful consequences. No one will “fire” you from your life, for instance if you never get around to that deck.

Procrastination is a straight-up source of unhappiness, though. It diminishes our self-esteem and sense of fulfillment and is the great inspiration of regret.  This is serious stuff! Your ideal, joy-fuelled, most satisfied life depends on it. Not such small potatoes, that. 

How can you start improving your life now? How can you defeat procrastination and gain control of your dreams?

Process.

Process makes perfect. Not practice. Process.

You cannot depend on will power or that magical thing called “motivation” to propel you. Will power can get you started, but if you’re trying to lose 20lbs or write a book, after the first week will power peters out. Will power is a sprinter, not a marathoner.

Motivation is not a dependable co-creator either. It has serious commitment issues!  If it’s raining out, you didn’t get enough sleep, you had a fight with your partner or one hundred other, perfectly justifiable things happen that it doesn’t like, it’s out.

Process is the great warrior against procrastination. Another word for “process” in this case is “habit.” Develop new, better, good habits and you’ve got your dreams by the tail. Really.

You do this by breaking the big things/dreams down into their components. As James Clear says we get fixated on the endgame (my taxes will be done, I’ll record a song, I’ll divorce my husband), when really, we don’t need the transformation from “out of shape” to “in shape,” for instance, as much as we need better habits, daily. 

No one “builds a house” – they hire a surveyor, they map out the basement, they dig a hole, they set a mold, the pour cement and so on.  You don’t “write a novel.” You write one page – or even one paragraph or one sentence – at a time. You don’t “powerlift 400 lbs.” You lift 50, then 55, then 65 and so on.

In practice this means taking tiny, daily actions towards your goals. Jeff Olsen calls this "the slight edge" - making small, continuous changes in a positive direction - until success is inevitable. Then to help yourself further, do as Leo Babauta says and “make it so easy that you can’t say no.”

How small? James Clear cites the example given by Stanford professor BJ Fogg suggesting that people who want to start flossing begin by flossing only one tooth. Just one! Why? Because in the beginning it’s not about performance; it’s about becoming the type of person who sticks to a new habit – no matter how small or insignificant. You are surveying your property. You are ensuring stable ground to build on.

You want to lose 20 lbs? Become the kind of person who stops drinking juice. Just start there. You want to learn Japanese? Commit to learning one new word a day. Do it at the same time every day, making it a seamless part of your routine.  Want to spend more time with your family? Commit to a 10 minute card game with your kids after dinner. Want a clean bathroom? Keep supplies handy, under the sink. When you notice the toilet is dirty, take 2 minutes to clean it. Take another 2 if you feel like it to do the mirror and counter too. In 5 minutes or less, cleaning the bathroom is one less thing to procrastinate about. 

The point is to start small and attainable. Create habits that require minimal effort so you guarantee immediate success and satisfy the instant gratification monkey. Doing those small things every day is process.

Old Joke: Q: How do you eat an elephant?    A: One bite at a time

You deserve to be engaged, inspired and excited about your life! Don’t let procrastination steal your dreams and leave you with a mush of regret in the end. Time waits for no one; do one small thing today you can do again tomorrow that will bring you closer to everything you want. Take control of your monkey mind and fully inhabit the one life you have.